You never know when a divorce is going to appear. This is something people rarely control. When children are involved in the divorce everything becomes more complicated. That is especially the case when referring to young children. According to both psychologists and every single experienced Tampa family law attorney out there, it is really important that the effects of divorce on children are properly understood. You basically have to consider children and deal with the divorce in different way as children are involved.
Problems Appear In The Pre-Divorce Phase
In most cases we see parents focused on the actual divorce. This is when children are taken into account. While this is definitely something necessary, even before the divorce starts the child can be affected. Children will demand attention. That attention is normally lost even before the divorce. You want to be sure that children understand what happens. If they think that they are the reason why marriage problems appear, it is obvious that something bad is going to happen, with children becoming secluded and feeling as if they are responsible for the eventual divorce.
Short Term Divorce Effects On Children
There are so many that can be mentioned. However, those that appear in most cases are aggression, sadness, depression, acting out, interpersonal conflicts, an increased dependency, negative sanctions, lower parental supervision, much lower academic achievements and social adjustment difficulty.
Long Term Divorce Effects On Children
What is really worrying is that the effects of divorce on children do not stop after the divorce is finalized. It is actually quite common to see that children have problems evolving and operating in society in the future because of the damage that was caused by the divorce. It is really important that children understand what happens and that parents are supportive. A failure to do this will not just cause short term effects. The life of the child can be irreparably affected when proper supervision and attention do not appear.
What Should You Do?
Helping children deal with divorce is not as easy as many think. The child does not really understand what happens. They will just see that parents are no longer together. Many end up feeling abandoned by one of the parent so resentment becomes normal.
The most important thing that you have to do as a parent that goes through a divorce is to remain open. You want to talk with the child and show as much love as possible. What is important for a child is to understand the fact that the divorce does not happen because of him/her. This is where communication is necessary. If the parents do not talk with the children, huge problems will appear.
On the whole, divorce affects different children in different ways. However, some effects are going to appear. It is always vital to manage the situation properly. Never blame the child for anything and be sure that you answer questions without putting blame on the other parent. It is so easy to blame someone for something bad that happened but it is not the child that should hear that.